Well today I went to see my doctor(Gastrologist) he doesn’t perform bariatric surgery at all and he is the one that did the upper EDG…Well I have been on Prevacid since I had my Gastric Bypass which was in 2004…

Why you ask which most of you are aware of Bariatric Doctors some or all suggest that we be put on some type of acid reflux medicine…So we won’t in the future get an ulcer…

Well the Gastrologist said that I should stop taking it and I will be fine, but I’m afraid to cause why does one say one thing and the other is like stay on it…It’s so confusing…I just don’t know what to do…

This is a very personal and embarrassing thing that is happening to me..

I have been burping so much more in the past week and I don’t know why…I’m so afraid to ask anyone else but I finally posted on Twitter to see if anyone had any suggestions…I take Prevacid and eat very slowly so I don’t understand how this can be happening…Do you know how embarrassing it is when this happens especially when I go out in public…I’m afraid to eat cause I can be talking and then a loud burp comes out…How humiliating…My husband tries so hard not to make a big issue out of it, but come on when I kiss him I’m afraid I might belch…How fair is that to him…

I hope this is not something else I have to learn to deal with for the rest of my life…

Today I was watching an early morning talk show and there was this guy on there that wrote a book about giving people who are overweight some tough love, cause part of the problems are why we are heavy from emotional issues…Ok first off would you be mean to someone who is already emotional…Granted he might in his own mind think that we need this “tough love”, but that is not a way to get through to people…How about some support and encouraging words instead of yelling…And he says he thinks like an overweight person cause he lost 40 lbs, that is the equivalent of going on a small diet…No you can think of your self as an overweight person when you have to lose 100 lbs or more…

I don’t want to sound mean and be like him…But it’s just hard when people who are not in our shoes say things like that…Life is tough enough the way it is…

Why is it that after almost 6 years of being thin, I still see the insecure overweight girl in the mirror…I don’t think I”m skinny in any way, and why is that? I think I”m more obessed now with my looks then I ever have in my whole life…Could it be that I always saw myself as overweight and always thought that wouldn’t change…Who knows…

I have people tell me how skinny I look, and I look at them back and say your just saying that to be nice to me…
I guess it’s hard to explain to people that my brain has never caught up with the rest of my body yet…:( And if you do try to explain, I get a oh get over it…

Could it be that I”m not feeling skinny yet cause I have to put my skin that is hanging on my stomach and tuck it into my jeans…That is not the most flattering thing to do, and on top of that I make sure that my arms are covered until I can get the “bat wings” taken care of…My husband tries to be so supportive, but if I can’t see myself naked how am I going to show anyone else…Maybe people are right and I need to just suck it up, but it’s really hard to do…